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March 03, 2010
Trying to get in the habbit again
So Im trying to get back into the habbit again of blogging. I went over to LiveJournal for a while, blogged on both, stopped on LJ, and posted nothing for a while. Well... Now Im back, its 2010, and Im 40.
What have I learned? Nothing....
Well obviously we learn and grow, but it seems my heart still goes out, I give it freely, try and be a giving person (a nice person), and for some reason, I still dont get what I want.
As the song goes, we get what we need. I needed to go through the recent changes, in order to understand myself, my wants, my desires, and hopefully next time love comes around, Ill be ready for it (yeah, I know we never are).
This time Im sticking to the notion, I wont look at anyone who may be under 30 unless they prove themselves mature. After remembering through someone elses actions, what its like being 25, its out of control and Im no longer at that point in my life. Its too bad, because it was a fun time, just very destructive, very indecisive, and very bad for me in general.
I also realized that I have elevated myself to a place where I am above people. Not in a "Im above people" way, but more in a "Ive grown so much in myself, that some other people need to take the same time, to get where I am in life". If that makes sense. Im at a place of better standings than someone who is just starting out and young.
I promised Id be a mentor, and I am, but what happens when someone isnt ready to learn. You cant force them. I mean, you can force them in other ways, but you cant make them grow. So do I abandon, and lead by example and watch as they make mistakes? certainly! Isnt that what a parent does with their kids? Do I remain there to help pick up the pieces? A bigger question is *should* I be there for that? Do they deserve that?
Anyway, time will tell and so will the story. For now, I start back at square one... 2010 and 40. :)
Posted by Des at March 3, 2010 05:42 PM