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September 20, 2004
Monday Monday.....
Im wondering this morning about the evolution of man. I know, how deep is that? Lol
I came across a cartoon in this mornings paper that had a bear going into a gun shop and asking for tranquilizer guns for the start of bear season. The joke was that he wanted to even the odds. This got me thinking about how power hungry *humans* have become.
My first reaction to the cartoon was "wow if bears really did have guns and were on the same mentality as humans, it would be a war" then I thought "deer season, duck season, pheasant season, turkey season". What gives humans the right to control the world? If we are so much smarter than the average bear then why do we hunt them and who are we to control population? Are we trying to save ourselves at the cost of a life of another animal on this planet?
Another example that comes to mind about the power struggle is the whole debate on gay marriage. Why does the president and so many others hate me so much? Some may say, its an issue and not personal but how can someone just dismiss it. The fact remains they are against me. Who are they to control me and what I do or feel or who I want to be with. Who gave them this power over me?
In my opinion it's a personal attack on each and every gay man and woman out there. You should take it as a person who hates you (many for that matter) regardless if you believe in the cause. I read about the states voting on this as well as the government and think to myself "these people don't even know me and they are voting on something that affects my life". They are passing judgement on me without even knowing me. Who I am or what Im about. Its sad to think that they don't see it as one individual with feelings as well as a life and personality. They see many people under one label. Its sad when the human race is so judgemental and so blind to see out past whats in front of them. I would love to hear others thoughts and opinions on this. Email me with your thoughts if you choose and I will post them if you like. I think it would be interesting to get others perspectives and input
So the rest of the day went well I guess. I forgot I had phone duty today. That meant I never signed on until a 1/2 late and on phone days I have to be there till at least 4:30. I wish I would have remembered because I would have gotten there later than I did.
At lunch I went for Chinese food and on the way back to work I saw a woman outside Kaiser crying. It made me wonder about who we are as individuals. I mean, I really wanted to ask if she was ok but coming from a total stranger it didnt seem appropriate. So I kept walking feeling a bit down because I didnt say anything. It almost seemed inhuman to just walk by someone in that state and say nothing. Perhaps a bit insensitive but regardless, the question is would anyone else have stopped if they had the same experience? My head says yes but unfortunatly I wish it didnt.
As for the evening. Ive been home about a couple of hours now. Watched Charmed which brings me to the next topic. Charmed?
I watched the very first episode this evening on TNT. Its kind of interesting to see how all the laws of the show changed from the original. First they talk about not being able to use their powers for personal gain, however they broke that rule several times through out the show. When Piper froze the chef in order to add to the dish before he ate it. Prue moving the cream and transfering it into her coffee. The other thing was the Warlock (Jeremy), Pipers boyfriend. She froze him in the elevator, and knocked him out. When he came to, he ran off. I was under the impression that Warlocks didnt have to walk anywhere lol. Perhaps my misunderstanding but just an observation. Im sure Ive seen warlocks down the road appear and disappear at will.
I changed the letters on our refrigerator to read "Fuck Steve for two dollars". That was kind of fun. Cant wait for the roommate to see it. hehe.
Well I will wrap it up here in case the rest of the evening is really lame and in case you are asleep by now, its time to wake up.
Wishing everyone reading this the best.
****** added Tuesday Morning, reflecting on Monday *********
Its funny how we build up walls around us to protect ourselves. Walls we dont even realize we've built. For example you can go through the course of a day and people who you see every day could throw minor attacks (not knowing) and we block each one with a shrug. The attacks were small and without even knowing they have done damage. Its not till all those "little" attacks are over that we realize how major all of them were in the course of our day.
For example, around 6:30pm yesterday I sat thinking it was a good day or at least an ok day. It wasnt till around 7:30/8ish that I realized all the events through out the day had triggered a fowl mood. I can look into each moment that I shrugged off and it wasnt a big deal at the time but all those little moments contributed to that trigger and how the day ends.
So whats the best thing to do? Tear down those walls and leave ourselves vulnerable? Or do we just need to allow those days to happen? Just curious as to how others deal with it all. Do you vent your frustration or pain as it happens? I mean what if your boss or coworker is one of them? Its a professional environment so you cant very well tell him/her that "your joke hurt my feelings". I would love to hear feed back on what people think.
Posted by Des at September 20, 2004 07:06 PM
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